8 things you didn't know that scare your manager

Photo by Jack Cain on Unsplash

I was discussing going from an individual contributor to a manager role over the last few weeks. There were many positive things that we covered as well as the harder side of people management. I figured I would do a quick write up on 8 things that I worry about on a regular basis. 

One. Missing an individual off a thank you post. When I am writing a thank you post for a post-project or other big milestone for a group. I need to double or triple check with people to ensure that every contributor is mentioned. There is no worse feeling than getting a private message saying 'You left out Mike'. This can also happen on a Friday afternoon coffee run when someone is hot-desking away from the main group. Sorry, Mike :) I still feel bad.

Two. Not being as good as the previous manager. A lot of the time you don't get to meet the previous loved manager. All you have to go on is the iconic status the team has told you. Even when you do get a hand over you still feel the pressure of being 'as good' as the previous manager. In the end, we know all have our different management styles and it works better with some more than others. Even though you adapt to each individual, at the back of your mind, you are always thinking 'I wonder what the team is thinking and what am I not doing as well'. 

Three. Not being fun enough. This one might not apply to all managers. But I have heard my fair share or synonyms to describe me when people first meet me. I am usually an observer to new groups before jumping in and high-fiving everyone. Over time this gets better as you get to know the team. Although there is a constant sense check around holding the right level of respect with the team. In particular, if you ever need to performance manage someone, it is very hard to do this if you have running jokes with the same person. So, bouncing between being casual enough and serious enough is always at the back of my mind.

Four. Being too hard on the 'rules'. We love to talk about full autonomy and run teams with no guard rails. But when you see someone having potentially legal implicating conversations with a customer. You first check if they changed roles and are in legal now. When you realise they are not, you are going to get involved. This is to ensure that the person realises the potential implication of their actions. This is easy in the example above as it involves legal items. When there is something your team needs to do or should do or something else is the greyer area. Working out what you should leave and what you should get involved in is the hard part. You don't want to send links to a rules list and you don't want to watch them head down the wrong road with negative implications.

Five. Being labelled as bias. In an environment where we try and be as equal as possible, this can be difficult. I am not talking about hiring the right candidate here. I am talking about getting to know your team on a more personal level in the context of improving psychological safety. When some of your team are more relatable to you and when some are less relatable. Even though you can adapt to different team members and be fair when assessing the real things that come up. When you have a lot of common interest you get along easier. Because of this, you work harder to try to avoid being biased and worse being labelled bias.

Six. Forgetting how many kids or pets someone has. When you are trying to ensure that you know your team outside of work. Having a good relationship with the team has many proven benefits. When you have a large team, you might find your manager sweating occasionally. Do they have 2 boys? Were they older or younger? Was it a dog or a cat they owned? Getting this wrong will certainly bring on a judgemental look.

Seven. Getting a bad result in a manager survey. My team reading this will no doubt have an evil smirk on their face. It is no secret I like to score high on practically anything. We are going through a Lead Impact survey process right now. The survey is to assess your direct manager and we send it around twice a year. The last 2 results over 12 months have been positive. Now I am waiting for the new results to come in. Thinking did my management tweaks in the last six months improve the team's view/performance or decrease it. There isn't anything I can do now but wait for the results. 

Eight. Being an accidental diminisher. This is a reference to one of my favourite books called Multipliers by Liz Wiseman (link). The book covers six accidental actions that managers do that diminish employees. It also talks about alternatives that will multiply your team's performance. So needless to say, performing a diminishing act and catching yourself doing it is not a highlight of my day. I try and keep the six acts listed below at the forefront of my thoughts. Although you cannot be perfect on all six at all times. It shouldn't stop you from trying to be. Your team will thank you for it. So, if you ever catch me being an Optimist, Rapid Responder, Pace Setter, Rescuer, Idea guy or Always On then just tap me on the shoulder and let me know. 

Side note as a fun experiment, do the quiz online to find out which ones you are. Then ask your team to tell you what they think you are. Last time I tried, it was a free for all. But I thank them for their honesty.

There are many more things that people managers are scared off, these are just a quick 8 that i thought of. I hope the worrying makes us better managers as we only want to do our best for our teams.

Note: Opinions expressed are solely my own and do not express the views or opinions of my employer.